Vision Boarding for Sober Success: Achieve Your 2025 Dreams Without Resolutions W/Jeannette Hounjet

In this insightful episode of the Confident Sober Women podcast, host Shelby welcomes recovery coach Jeanette Hounjet to discuss creating meaningful visions for the new year instead of traditional resolutions. Jeanette, founder of Now She's Living, shares her personal recovery journey and expert guidance on vision boarding and intentional goal-setting for women in recovery.

Key Topics Discussed:

• Jeanette's unique recovery path, from her first AA meeting at 21 to discovering personalized recovery approaches through She Recovers
• Why traditional New Year's resolutions may not serve us and alternative approaches to goal-setting
• The importance of examining inherited beliefs and conditioning when creating personal visions
• How addiction can stunt emotional development and value formation
• Practical steps for creating and implementing an effective vision board
• Strategies for remaining open to receiving what you envision
• The role of beliefs, thoughts, and feelings in manifestation
• Why keeping your vision private initially can protect your energy and dreams

Notable Quotes: "There is not just one road to recovery." - Jeanette Hanjae "Let your thoughts be your cheerleader, not this downer voice that is keeping you stuck." - Jeanette Hanjae

Practical Tips:

• Start with curiosity when creating your vision board
• Choose visual representations of 5 key desires for the year
• Practice gratitude as if your desires are already manifesting
• Use "just for today" mindset when working toward goals
• Begin with small, consistent actions rather than overwhelming changes

Resources Mentioned:

• Now She's Living website (nowshesliving.com)
• Free 2025 Vision Planner download
• She Recovers community

Connect with Jeanette Hanjae: Website: nowshesliving.com 
Instagram: @nowshesliving Pinterest: @nowshesliving

Transcript

Hey there, Jeanette. Thank you so much for joining me today for the Confidence Sober Women podcast. I am so excited that you're here and what an exciting opportunity for us to really dive into looking ahead at the next year to come. Obviously this time of year, everyone's talking about, New Year's and I don't really believe in the resolutions personally.

I know some people like that word for a variety reasons, but I do think it's a very reflective. Opportunity if we choose to really look at, where we've been this year, what went well, what didn't go well, and then really where we are going, looking at the future self version of ourselves so that we can understand.

What we want, because if we don't have a vision of that future self, then how would we even know what the roadmap is to get there? And I know we're going to get into all of it, but first, I'd like to take the opportunity for you to share some of your story with us and a little bit of what's going on in your recovery space.

And then we're going to talk. 

Thank you. Thank you, Shelby, for having me. So I'm Jeanette Hanjae. I am a woman in recovery for many years now because my recovery journey didn't, it didn't go very smoothly at the beginning. There was an awareness that things weren't going that great, but it took a few twists and turns.

One of the things that I started with was recovery from  Anger from lack of self love from, lack of self worth. That was really the first place where I started. And of course, later on, I was sober curious. But there came a point where I decided that, full sobriety was really the way to go for me.

So that's where I am now. And I've started a business. It's called now she's living to help women in recovery love themselves. And yeah, so I'm very excited to be here and talking with you today. 

Wonderful. So I'm curious if you can say just a tiny bit more, I know this isn't a mini episode, so we are trying to keep things tight, but what did you like use or how did you get. 

Involved in recovery, like some people would go to 12 step programs to people to read books. Like, how did you discover a program or what did you? Yeah. 

Yeah. It's really interesting because I tried so many things. I can tell you that my 1st AA meeting I went to AA for the 1st time when I was 21.

I am. I'm 45 now. And at the time I grew up in Panama. So at the time, that was one of the only options that I knew of, and that was available out there. However, it didn't really resonate with me. There were a few things that they just they weren't aligned with my, beliefs and values.

And so it was hard for me to stick with it. I would come, I would go I would always look at it and say, oh that's too much. I'm not quite there. I was very lucky when I came to Canada years later to find different avenues of recovery and to also learn how That it's okay to do it a different way, that there is no, just one road to recovery.

And that really opened the doors as with She Recovers they really talk about the patchwork of recovery and how that is an individualized path.  That gave me so much freedom and honestly, I was very relieved to, to know that my recovery is my own, and that I can, choose a way that feels nurturing and good to me to do it.

Because before I felt that recovery was very much steeped in shame and like you're doing it wrong sort of thing. So yeah, that was my journey. 

Interesting. Thanks so much for sharing that. And I'd like to highlight that as well. However we get here is really a personal situation and it's fine, right?

It's good, right? We're just thankful that we are on the road to recovery, that we have chosen to live a life without substances. And even if you don't view yourself as an addict, or if you didn't even have a problem with substances, like if you don't use them, your life will be better anyway, because they are to all people, no matter who you are.

And so even the world health organization says no amount of alcohol is safe to use. What we know now from brain research and science is it tells us that, they're just not good to use. So anyway, it's good. And I always say too, we need to take a layered approach to things, like worked for us, in the beginning, like I got sober on AI too, probably around the same time as you, and there wasn't anything else.

Really around available at that time anyway that I knew of. And so that's what worked for me. I did it. It really was great. I love the program. I still promote it, especially in the beginning. And then I layered on a lot of other things like really good therapy and trauma work and complimentary medicine and like other things like she recovers and just a lot of other tools, quit lit.

And so we have to become willing to. Look at what else we need, like maybe you are a woman who in the past have always made New Year's resolutions and you're like, this is what my mom did. This is what everybody does. I do it. And so I'm like thinking about it in categories or however you do it, maybe you've always done it that way.

And then now you're, maybe you're older or like somebody else put a little bug in your ear and you're starting to think maybe this whole resolution thing isn't the right approach for me, and try to look at it a different way. And I think we're going to chat about that. So I'm curious.

Yeah, great. Segue into what did how do you view that? 

1 of my things is, I love what you said about sometimes we just have these inherited things that we do. And it could be from your family, but it could also be from the media, or it could be from, your friends, your school, we have these layers of conditioning that we're not even aware of a lot of times.

So one of the things that I think is super important for creating a vision for yourself for the year, creating a vision board, or, I'm like you, I'm not really into the resolution thing, but creating that is getting really curious with yourself. Like, where did these things come from?

Is it really what I want? Or, was some of it what they told me to want? There's nothing wrong with receiving advice from people you love and, traditions and things like that.  But if you're going to create a vision, let's make sure it's yours. 

Absolutely. I love that you said that so much because one of the things that I focus on and my programs and anytime I work with clients in general is values.

And to me, that's what you just said is, and that's a really important part of creating our own vision for even our whole life or each year or each month or our family is really a values question. And sometimes I think most people. don't really know a lot about that. We don't learn it in school. No one's sitting around talking about what are your personal core values when you're like going through high school, although I think they should. 

But, and we tend to adopt what we were raised with. Whoever our caregivers were, we take on what they were. So if they were like, Christian people. We are like, okay, this is what we're doing. I'm a Christian or I, I value education. Like everybody's, very highly educated. And so that's my important to me.

So I'm going to go do that, or we value adventure or fun or whatever it is. You see these things and we, and then we go through adolescence, right? Is that 18 or 13 to 22 year old period of time, sometimes a lot longer where we are Our literal developmental task is to separate from our parents and discover who we are separate from our parents and so if we're lucky starts to creep in and then all of a sudden you see people being like.

It looks like rebellion, right? Or bucking the system or something, but really what's happening is they're developmentally trying to separate. Now, a lot of times they're the same, might be like, actually, I really, that is who I am, and then sometimes they're not, but, and sometimes people live their whole lives, particularly women in addiction, because when you start drinking and using, you get your emotional, growth stunted at the age you started, they say.

So if you started drinking and using it 14 or 15 years old and your brain and emotionality stops developing, now you've attached all of those values that you've picked up since then and you've run with it in your life because you didn't have the opportunity to develop them. And you might get to 40 and think I actually really hate everything to do with education.

I don't really want to be I done all this work and I don't want to be this, or I really don't believe in this thing. I feel like we get stunted in that, unique experience. And so now we're in recovery, we're looking at these things. It should always be from a values perspective.

Yeah, and it's also a really beautiful opportunity to ask yourself those questions and, rediscover who you are. Because I, I feel that what happens a lot of the time is we go, we remove the substance, right? And then, you We're not sure what are my values? What do I really like? We start asking those questions and that might bring up a little bit of fear of change, but it's so important because it's going to be key and really Creating a life that feels good to you.

There's no point in trying to manifest or make happen somebody else's dream, somebody else's desire, because you're not going to feel good. And the whole point of part of our recovery is really reclaiming our power and feeling good.  

So at the most basic of levels, because we only have such a short time, how do you do that?

Like, how do you, or if you were working with somebody new, like a very brand new baby person new to any kind of vision board or manifestation or even values, like what are some of the steps that you walk them through?  

Okay, so for the basic creation of the board, let's say you're going to sit down, you're going to create your board today.

We're going to start with curiosity. We already talked a little bit about that, right? And then  the whole, the vision board is representing your desires. So you could, let's say, find magazines, find pictures, find images. Once you got curious and you decided,  decide on five things that you want to bring into your life this year.

So find a visual representation of that so that you can look at it and keep it. in the front of your mind every day. I'm going to run through the steps and then we can go back a little bit. You have to be open to receiving these things. That's a big one of it because sometimes we want something, fear creeps in or we don't think we're worth it.

Emotions might come up around these things. So see, notice how you feel. And the biggest thing is to be open to receiving that. Thing that you've asked for in your vision board.  We'll talk about strategies in a little bit, but the final thing is.  Be very grateful, act as it's already part of something you have.

I like to say that, when you order something from Amazon, you're already excited. It's coming your package. You're waiting for it. You're looking out the window. When is it gonna get here  use that? Be excited for it already coming to you Sometimes we think we have to see it first, but it's not really the way vibration works It's not really the way law of attraction and assumption works.

It's already having that gratitude and the feeling of excitement for it. So you have these components. The visual is going to help you remember what your desire is and sometimes even  really get in tune with, Hey, is this really something I want? So you're going to create that. Then you're going to really be open to receiving that desire that you've asked for, because a lot of the times  We notice there is a little bit of friction.

There's a little bit of resistance, right? And  the last one is to be so grateful that it's already in your space and you act from that place.  

Okay, wonderful. I love this overview so much. So basically you've given us like a clear picture of what a vision board is. Yeah. And by the way, And I'm sure you can speak to this can look any way it could be digital.

It could be a poster board. It could be in a journal where it's just, like Pictures that you cut out and paste or draw in like a small book. There's a there's really no rules here It's no rules gonna work for you except for the fact that I do think it should be someplace where you are going To visually see it regularly yes know where you're gonna see it.

So that's the So I'm going to start with you, just giving us a general framework and kind of the, and the why of it. Like you shared a little bit of the, why to help us get real clear. To help us remember to remind us. And then also to start to begin to. Notice the emotions that we've attached to some of this stuff and how we can feel it in our bodies.

So that's the. The overview of what this looks like when we're creating a vision board or a future for. For our next upcoming year. I love that. 

And one thing I wanted to suggest as well is, yes, you want to see it. So it could be your screensaver. It could be on your phone, but I would highly suggest to keep it to yourself for a while, right?

Because it can create resistance. You don't want to be sharing. Oh, look at that. I want this and I want that. And I want that. And then include other people's opinions, beliefs, thoughts about it into your energy. 

You're so right about that. And, a lot of times when we are doing things like this, we get really excited, right?

Like it's, it might be a little scary, but it's also it's like that kind of excitement fear, right? So we're like, Oh, I really want to run a marathon this year. That's on my heart. I want that, and you're like, Oh, this is like exciting, but it's also super scary. And yes, there's a lot of bubbling up things around it, but yet as soon as we start to share anything with the world,  Thought feeling creative work, anything, even with our partners or our moms or our children or people that are our best friend, everyone is, does have opinions and we're always judging, it doesn't mean that we're bad.

It just means that's happening. And and some people are better at this than others, right? Some people have no filter. Some people have  manners, right? And so somebody might say to you yeah,  Like you're not going to run a marathon. Like you don't even jog. 

Yeah. Or that's too hard. What are you thinking?

And so immediately, even if you are set on it, you're going to have a conscious response to that at the neurological level, right? Like it's going to get inside of you at some level, which is then energetically going to have to. be worked through by you, and take up more energy than you need to like, get rid of it.

So I would say I agree. Unless you're really sure  you know this person really well and that they are gonna support certain parts of that vision board for you, I would be cautious as well. 

Yeah. 

Yeah, and that's okay. It's not like you're trying to be secretive. 

Yeah, it's not like you're hiding it.

You're just making sure that you're very rooted in it, that you're your full focus is on this and not like you said, on trying to convince anybody else or You don't need anybody else's approval for your dreams. They are your dreams and you can say whatever you want, but you have to be prepared that there might be resistance for other people.

It's absolutely up to the individual, but I truly believe that  keeping it  to yourself,  Is a good way to not encounter that fear and resistance that other people might have, 

yeah, I totally agree. And what you just said is other people's fear and resistance. It's really is their stuff.

That's a lot of it is and some of it's their own internal judgment of themselves, gosh, I should be doing that. Or I've always wanted to do that too, but I've never made it happen. And so there's this other dialogue happening for the other person that's probably has nothing to do with you, but because you've now brought it to the forefront, it's going to look like an attack and not feel so great.

Yeah, I like the protection around that. And you can drip things out, real kind of slower. You're like, Oh, I was thinking about trying to really focus on my fitness this year. Or I've decided I really want to focus on health. Like that's going to be a big goal for me.

And so there's a lot of ways you can drip out the concepts that look like what you're trying to do, but without saying all of it, just to protect it, here's my 

vision board.  

Could you say a little bit more, maybe even offer some strategies? I don't know this. I know that this is a very big concept around what it means to be open to the things. 

Yeah, absolutely. So  the three steps that I like to work with around, being open to receive is there's belief. It's the first thing that's going to happen. There's a belief that we have created, I'm not sure if created is the word, but that we have established through many different avenues since kids, since we're growing up, right?

That through things that we hear, conditioning, school our parents, our caretakers, that's the first. There's beliefs. Then the beliefs. And those thoughts are going to manifest into feelings about it. And for example, if you put a mansion in your vision board, I want this beautiful big house, but you have a core belief that oh that's just for other people.

That's not something that's possible for me. That's a.  Or let's say you have a resistance that a belief that wealth is not good that wealthy people are bad. You have to notice those beliefs because they are going to prevent you from receiving what you want and it's  So reframing those beliefs, one of the things you can do is affirmations around the beliefs, right? 

It's amazing. Even the vision board can help you notice what you believe about things that, maybe you didn't realize before. So doing affirmations is a great way to see where you have resistance.  and start saying to yourself, if you feel resistance to, that big  dream, goal, whatever it may be, let's put the example of the marathon as well.

Who am I to run that? I can't do that. I'm never  start affirming to yourself.  I am a strong, capable woman. Yes, I can run a marathon. I've okay. So that's, as far as talking about  then comes  the thought and  thoughts are so the core belief is what's going to influence your thought the thought is going to be i can't that's what really the thought is going to be and or who am i and so we can easily begin to reframe thoughts so the willingness is of course First thing you notice the thought, which we're not used to doing as women in recovery, because we're used to numbing.

We're used to, shoving things down. But once we've removed the substances, we have this space now to start noticing our thoughts, all of the things that are running through your mind all the time and going, is this thought supporting me? Is this helping me create the life that I want, or is it holding me back still?

So notice your thoughts. And see where you can start reframing them to supportive thoughts. Let your thoughts be your cheerleader, not, this downer voice that is keeping you stuck. So yeah, so then  noticing the thoughts and  thoughts are gonna create feelings.  They're gonna come anyways, but we can, as we notice the thoughts, as we reframe them, our goal is to start to feel better and better, to start to feel good, because that vibration of feeling good Is what allows things to come to you when you're constricted, when you are saying, I can't, I grew up thinking I can't.

And now I'm telling myself I can't. And now I feel terrible because I believe that  it's very hard to accept and receive good in your life. So with the feeling, You can visualize, take time to visualize yourself feeling different.  Who would you be if you believed and thought that you could have that  and you would feel different? 

Who would you be if you visualized yourself crossing that finish line? And that marathon, right? Like happy, excited. And this is all a process that takes time, but you can start small, say, I'm going to do this one minute in the morning, one minute before bed,  as long as you maintain that momentum to To keep at it, keep going, don't start by saying, I'm going to, I'm going to meditate 30 minutes a day and visualize this because we're busy,  right?

We have so many things going on. But so those would be, that would be my advice around that.  

That's so helpful. I really appreciate that. And I think a lot of us can really understand those things and see how we can. Really put them into place pretty quickly. They're not like super high level things.

It doesn't feel very overwhelming. And I really want, I want to say to that  the consistency of any of these things is what matters the most. And we do need to do things in very small, manageable chunks that are done consistently over time every single day. Whether if you so say you decide I really want to create this vision board and I'm going to work on manifesting these things and becoming open and so pick like the time of day you want that to happen.

I prefer doing things in the morning with all of my other morning meditation and routines. I'm going to enter something new. Maybe midday or nighttime is better for you, but pick the time when you will do it every single day like what we want to do is what we will do. Every morning you sit and you have your morning routine with your coffee, your book or whatever you'd like to do and you're  maybe you already do a little bit of a meditation.

If not, you just, yeah, start with two minutes. I would really recommend that or three minutes. I would really just start with two or three minutes. If you're new, you can use one of those like apps. You can just set a timer on your phone and sit quietly, with an open heart. There's a lot of ways to do that and just allow, like call in the open mindedness and willingness around this particular, these particular goals and dreams for you.

For sure. And one 

more thing I wanted to say, we have The tool of just for today, one day at a time. So one of the things that I like to do, that's why I, with new year's resolutions. Okay. To stop one day at a time, just for today, I'm going to do this just for today. I'm going to notice my thoughts.

I'm going to see where I'm, putting myself down just for today to me is very helpful. And I find it's something that you can use that feels manageable.  

I think that is so true and especially in times of overwhelm, when we're overly busy, when we have a lot going on, whether our own children or our work or whatever we have, everyone's got a lot of stuff.

And there are times for us that are extremely busy like right now, holiday time or other times. And when those times come, sometimes the overwhelm can be just so heavy and it doesn't allow us to remember to  stay in the moment, right? And so then one day at a time, like this moment right now, like us back, but then as we start to open up and we get familiar with this concept, we put the things on the board, we have our goals and dreams.

We have our statements that we're using to change the affirmations to change our thinking patterns, which is a slow process, but it does happen if we do these things consistently over time. And then I love what you said at the end too, and this is what I always talk about when we talk about future self work is really designing that future self in every single aspect that you can.

What is she wearing? Where is she having coffee? What are you driving? Who are your friends? If you're running that marathon, what outfit are you wearing? What kind of shoes? Where is it going to be located? Like every little detail. 

Yeah. You started getting really familiar with her, right?

Yes. 

So you know her. Yes. So that way every time you're faced with a decision particularly when it's not an easy one and you're like what would that future, you can call it, call her a name, six figure  or whatever you want to call her. Like you can call her a name and then you can say, what would that version of me do in this situation?

What would she do? 

Exactly. And you started acting from the end, right? Like you act how that person that has these things that is, has that life, what would she do? 

Yeah. We want to start with the end in mind and then work our way back. So it's just so much easier and much more manageable. Cause like the concept of running a marathon or really doing anything big feels like ridiculous.

There's just no way I can do that. But when you backtrack from how, when you want to do that all the way up until. Six months out, three months out, all the way up to today and you're like, okay what could I do today, tomorrow that's going to get me to that goal? 

Yeah, 

I can go out and buy a new pair of shoes and a cute outfit and then I can go for a one mile walk.

Yeah. And then tomorrow I can do the same thing or I can start to jog and walk, and then we just do those little tiny things in accordance to the plan to get us to the end. So backing into it is my favorite thing. 

I love it.  

So thank you so much, Jeanette. I know this was fast. We literally scratched the tip of the iceberg on this topic.

So we definitely would love to have you come back next year and do a full episode around like vision boards and future self work, because I don't think this has talked about enough specifically when it comes to incorporating our values and really help us each get closer to this concept and what it really means to us personally.

So I'd love that. So where do you like people to get in touch with you if you, if they want to?  

So great. My website is now she's living. com. You can find me with that name on Instagram as well, or Pinterest. And I wanted to share with everybody that one of the free downloads that I have on my website right now is a vision planner for 2025.

So please feel free to go and download that to use as well.  

Wonderful. Everyone, just make sure you go do that as you're making these plans to do your vision for next year. Grab her free download and just thank you so much, Jeanette, for your time and I wish you a happy holiday season and I look forward to seeing you in the new year.

You as well. Thank you.